What is lymphedema?
Lymphedema is the swelling of tissues in the body from a build up of protein-filled fluid that is normally drained naturally through the body’s lymphatic system. Most seen in the arms or legs, individuals can experience lymphedema in nearly any area of the body including the abdomen and genitals. Lymphedema can be caused or triggered by many medical treatments, including cancer treatment. Or any treatment, medical condition, or accident that causes damage to the lymph nodes (CDC).
In severe cases of lymphedema, where fluid is blocked from draining around the body, there is an increased risk for infections, skin breakdown, and sepsis. The individual may also have a hard time being mobile or maintaining some daily activities. Treatment for lymphedema can include massage, compression stockings or bandages, monitored skin care, surgery, or sequential pneumatic pumping (WHO).
How does lymphedema interfere with intimacy?
The effects of lymphedema often interfere with daily life, as well as intimacy, body image, and sexuality. Some of the more common symptoms that hinder ability are:
- Swelling of the affected body part; arm, leg, fingers, toes, or even the genitals
- Tightness and heaviness
- Restricted movement
- Skin changes: hardening, thickness, frailty
- Recurring infections
There are also complications of lymphedema that have a direct impact on life. These can be:
- Severe infections like cellulitis, which may require antibiotic or more intense treatment
- Sepsis. A dangerous condition that can occur when skin infections go untreated and cause death.
- Skin leakage. With trapped lymph fluid build-up, the fluid can begin to seep through the skin. This can cause small breaks in the skin and blistering.
- Cancer. A rare form of soft tissue cancer has been linked to those untreated cases of lymphedema.
Not only do these things hinder the ability to be intimate with yourself or partner, but it also takes a direct hit to the mental psyche and health of the individual. Sudden changes to the way our bodies work, or function can create a tailspin of mental health issues and roadblocks that will need to be addressed- and are all totally normal!
For some people getting to know their bodies again, adjust to the changes that lymphedema has created, or learn how to compression wrap or cover their sensitive areas to feel more comfortable will take various amounts of time and therapy sessions.
It is important that the individual address all aspects of living with lymphedema to ensure the best overall outlook and treatment plan. Knowing and understanding the conditions or diseases you live with can help to empower you to know all your choices, options, and pathways to getting back to the life and intimacy that you desire.
Intimacy & Lymphedema
While lymphedema might step in and change how one is able to be intimate, when, or in what ways- it is vital to remember that with intimacy and sexuality, where there is a will, there is a way!
This journey is personal, private, and different for every human. What works for you may not work for the next person and it is okay to try various or multiple different methods, treatments, or paths to pleasure. Here are some things to consider when stepping back into intimacy while coping and living with lymphedema.
- Pelvic floor dysfunction could be present in your situation. This condition can cause issues with intimacy, incontinence of the bladder and bowel, abdominal pain, weakness, and many more issues. This is true for men and women and help can be found with your physical therapist who has a focus or specialty in this area.
- Genital Lymphedema can be difficult to work through, but there are specialists who can help. Check out our article on Genital Lymphedema for more information.
- Begin with yourself. Rather than trying to jump in to the “same old routine” with your partner, give yourself time and space to examine, investigate, and get to know your changing body. Touch the areas where skin changes have occurred and note how you feel physically and mentally. Repeat this everywhere you or your partner might touch during intimacy. This will give you a roadmap of safe zones, areas where touch feels good or bad, and help your partner to navigate these areas safely.
- Body Image Issues. If you are struggling with body image issues, especially around the areas where lymphedema is affecting your body, consider taking action to find clothing, lingerie, or even “sexy” intimate wraps designed to help with compression for these moments. You can also act in the bedroom or area where you will be practicing these intimate moments by leveling the ambiance in the room to your needs- darkening or lightening the room, adjusting the bedding, pillows, or other items ensuring your comfort. For some, adding a blindfold into the routine can help to lessen anxiety, fear, and trepidation.
- Mindset. So much about intimacy and connection is a mindset. If your mindset is struggling, dark, or fearful, this will play out in your ability to carry out these acts or moments. It is vital to address these issues prior to attempting heavy intimacy acts to not cause further disconnect or unnecessary hard emotions.
- Communication. The verbal connection grease- communication! Whether with ourselves or with our partner, being open and honest about how you are feeling, the things you are desiring or hoping for, the needs you have, and the fears and worry are all things that should be discussed and communicated before heavy intimacy acts take place. Slowly dipping your toes back into the intimate waves of life is okay and totally normal!
By allowing yourself the time and space you need to get comfortable with your physical self, your mental being, and your partnership, you can ease back into intimacy in a way that works with your changing body. Empowering Intimacy offers many resources and help for those who might need some direction when dealing with these challenges. Please reach out to our team or check out our other informational and educational articles on site.
Citations:
Centers for Disease Control and Prevention
World Health Organization
National Cancer Research Foundation
City of Hope